The Power of One

What can one person do?

We often ask this question when faced with insurmountable odds or unfathomable injustice.

In recent years, many are asking themselves that question around how to combat climate change, homophobia, gun violence, or healthcare inequity – you can actually pick about a hundred given the state of our world today.

When I start to lose hope, I remind myself that many of the world’s most successful movements, non-profits, and social enterprises were started by ordinary people. Usually by one person, maybe two people,who saw a need. 

People like….

Shannon Watts, founder of Moms Demand Action (gun control)

Candice Lightner, founder of Mothers Against Drunk Driving

Saint Teresa of Calcutta, founder of Missionaries of Charity

Ian and Brittany Bentley, founders of Parker Clay

Oprah Winfrey (yes, she was once just an ordinary news reporter)

Sojourner Truth

Greta Thunberg, climate activist

Nelson Mandela

And many more individuals I have recently been reading about in the amazing book, Citizens: Why the Key to Fixing Everything is All of Us (highly recommend!)

But then….

This person or those people connected with others to make their vision a reality. They were able to rally like-minded individuals and start a movement.  That is the power of a team.

This is why I am committed to helping every single person understand that their voice matters. When you speak up, you are a magnet for those who see the world the way you do and want to join together with you to solve complex problems. 

If no one person speaks out, others who believe the same thing can’t find each other and make change. (TWEET THIS!)

I have long dreamed about creating a movement called One Dollar DIfference. Donating $1 might not seem like enough on its own to benefit anyone. But what if you can inspire  800,000 people to all donate $1 to cause at the same time? Or each donate one hour of time to a community effort? That is an impact!

Empathy is what enables us to connect and engage each other. To solve these tough problems together. To make a difference. 

Never be afraid to stand up and act as “just one.”. In truth, you rarely are ever alone. You just have to connect with others to have the impact you desire

If you want your team to more effectively bring the ideas of “just one” to life, I can help! Let’s chat about an empathy workshop or talk to boost collaboration, innovation, and performance – and make magic happen!

Photo credit: Guardian ng

Empathy is Not This

When people are scared or unsure, they run back to what they know. And that’s what some leaders are doing in today’s post-pandemic workplace. And it’s pissing me off.

I read this article the other day and had….opinions. 

Today, as the pandemic fades and a recession looms, employers are back to their old ways — reacting to market conditions, sometimes haphazardly and sometimes without much compassion. 

Being an empathetic leader does not mean you have to be “the cool parent” or that you need to fix things. (TWEET THIS!)

As the article states, “Managers need to be empathetic…but they must also provide workers with guidance and direction and not shield them from economic realities.”

First, it’s dead on that the Pandemic forced leaders and companies to find humanity. We were in/are in a global crisis. All we have is our humanity. People’s lives were turned upside down. Of course, we turned to compassionate leadership. To empathy. We HAD to. 

But this was not a new trend that just popped up. The signs all pointed to a new model of leadership before anyone ever heard about herd immunity. Study after study showed that the Industrial Revolution models of leadership were having less of an effect. That worker’s desires, combined with technology and transparency, demanded a new leadership model: One based on collaboration and connection. A more human workplace. And the rewards? HUGE. Increased productivity, engagement, retention, top talent attraction, morale, innovation, performance, and customer satisfaction The data existed way before COVID began.

The pandemic just accelerated the need to adopt these new models. There was no other way forward but to adapt. 

Now that we are coming out of the pandemic, though, there’s backlash. Back to bossism. Command and control. As if, “They had their fun being treated like human beings but now it’s back to work.”

It’s MADDENING. 

Second, only leaders who don’t understand what is truly meant by empathy hold this position. Your fear and inability to adapt are showing. 

Empathy is not about caving into crazy demands, letting workers do whatever they want to do, or being okay with slipping performance. It’s about listening, getting curious, sitting with someone’s struggle or perspective, and finding a way forward.

Where do people get this stuff? Why do they empathetic leadership as either/or when it’s BOTH/AND? This is what I’ve dedicated myself to sharing, teaching, and inspiring.

Leaders who adopt HEALTHY empathetic habits with their teams can still expect high performance, set boundaries, and avoid burnout. They can just do so IF they have the right tools to embrace empathy in a healthy way (SNEAK PEEK: This is what my new book will be about.)

If you are not, you are not practicing empathy – call it something else!

Photo Credit: 

How Your Body Reacts to Mistakes vs. Success

I remember how my body felt when I made those BIG mistakes. Do you? How does your body’s reaction compare to your successes? My mistakes felt a little something like this…..

Panic rising up my chest into my now flushed face.

My stomach somehow dropping to my feet in the opposite direction.

Numb or tingling hands and feet.

The sound of my own heartbeat in my ears.

My eyes welling up with tears.

Success causes a very different physiological reaction than mistakes, doesn’t it?! But which are more valuable to making you the person you are? 

But we often gloss over our successes and stay laser focused on the mistakes because of the trauma in our bodies that those mistakes cause.

In great detail, I can describe all of those heart-stopping mistakes:

In college where I served as my sorority’s Rush chair during a crucial year. I had managed to turn attitudes around and mobilize everyone to work as a team to save the chapter – but screwed up the very manual process for the last round, in essence, dis-inviting maybe about 50-100 women who wanted to join us, with no way to change the decision, leaving our chapter in dire straits and my sisters furious with me.

My first management consulting engagement right out of college, where I spent weeks coding computer-based training, only to press the wrong button the night before our manager needed to compile the code and – POOF- it was all gone.

That brand new marketing job where I was thrown in to picking up on organizing our presence at a very large and important sales trade show. And despite triple-checking requirements and timing because I had never done this before, we completely missed the set-up time, and the VP of Sales had to bail me out.

That time I poorly estimated costs and hours on two of my very first consulting projects, resulting in great money for my subcontractors, but barely enough for myself. 

And SO MANY MORE…

But what I also take away from those mistakes are the lessons learned, like many more famous successful people do. How to perform better. How to pay attention to detail. How to communicate more clearly. How to listen to instructions and ensure I repeat back what’s expected so we are both on the same page.

Those mistakes make me the valuable professional I am today. Without them, I might not be as successful. And they led to so many more wins in my career. Leading a global roadshow. Pivoting brand messaging to boost sales. Speaking on stages about the power of empathy.  Researching and publishing books. Guiding clients to connect and engage through empathy with the stakeholders who matter most.

Your mistakes may cause intense trauma, but they provide the fire that forges the successful person you are today.(TWEET THIS!) Older. Wiser. Sharper. You now know what to do and when to take your hand off the hot stove!

Looking at them that way, is there ever really such a thing as failure?

Photo credit: The Blow Up on Unsplash

Reinvent or Renew in the New Year?

Perhaps a new way to approach your new year’s goals this year is to decide:

Do I want to reinvent or renew?

This question asks you to reflect on how the last year went for you, which is a much more nourishing way to plan for the future. 

As a recovering Type A overachiever, my bulleted list of 35 new goals (tactics, really) wasn’t serving me anymore so I came up with three new ways to set goals.

But this year, I’ve had the privilege of working with one of my besties, women’s coach Jamie Greenwood, who guides ambitious, big dreaming women on how to live life on their terms. And together, we created NOURISH, a unique retreat to approach the new year with more ease and joy. (Please join my email list to know next time we run it!)

Our first step, before blazing into new year goal setting, is to clear the decks and reflect on the past year.

What went right? What am I most proud of from this past year? When did I feel most fulfilled and energized? What do I want to RENEW?

What held me back this past year? What did not align with my values? What actions, habits, or behaviors (or people) did not serve me well? What can I REINVENT?

Not every new year requires a complete personal transformation! If you thoughtfully reflect on the past year, perhaps you can merely turn up the volume on what’s already working for you. (TWEET THIS!)

For me, I’ve reflected on the many years I’ve offered brand story and messaging consulting to both solopreneurs and fast-growth businesses. The work was starting to drain me. For every amazing client that embraced our co-created work, brought it to life, and found tremendous success, others paid me well yet never executed –  and stayed stuck. And that made me incredibly sad.

With the launch of my book The Empathy Edge, I began delivering keynotes and leadership training about the power of empathy as a strategic leadership, culture, and brand advantage.

Eyes sparkle. Flames rekindle. New leadership paradigms emerge. Attendees leave my talks inspired to redefine success, align their personal values with their career goals, and bring humanity back to their work. And I was inspired to do work that helps people be more compassionate while still achieving excellence. Yes, it can be done!

For me and for Red Slice, this new year is one of REINVENTION. I’m adapting my business model to do more of what lights me up and makes a difference.  I am repositioning myself primarily as an empathy speaker, facilitator, and author.

Strategic advisory work (aka, brand strategy and story consulting) will be less of my focus, and only on an exclusive basis for right-fit corporate clients and larger organizations.

What is a right-fit client? Ready and willing to adapt, revamp, do things differently, and embrace empathy in their leadership, culture, and brand engagement.  Ready to connect and engage emotionally to accelerate impact and revenue.

While I will longer promote my SLICE engagements to solopreneurs, I still love supporting ambitious passionate people doing great work.. Existing courses, plus a new workshop and 5-week course will help you craft a winning brand story and strategy – with empathy at its core – to stand out, attract more ideal customers, and grow your impact.

And of course, my content and podcast will continue to inspire you to amplify your impact. Remember my mantra:  Cash flow, creativity, and compassion are not mutually exclusive!

This is a big reinvention for me and for Red Slice and I hope you will join me in redefining success and hopefully, making the world a more empathetic place. Lord knows we need it.

Stay in the loop on all the changes! Be sure you’re on my email newsletter list for the new website launch and for my new Brand Story Breakthrough course coming soon!

 Photo Credit: Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash 

Bridging Political Divides With Empathy

Can we ever bridge our political divides here in the US? Every day, things seem to get worse. We argue over guns, abortion, civil rights, and whether removing state secrets from the White House and locking them in your safe at home constitutes a crime. 

But what would happen if people on both sides could engage in meaningful dialogue? What if we all took personal responsibility to spot the lies by getting curious and doing our homework?

Recently on The Empathy Edge podcast, I  got to talk to a Twitter influencer I’ve been following for some time now, David Weissman. David and I discuss his story and how he grew up only consuming Conservative information and assumed it was all true. How we believed Democrats were trying to hurt this country and the shared values that attracted him to Trump’s campaign in 2016. David talks about how one Twitter conversation with actress and comedian Sarah Silverman sparked his curiosity to dig deeper into the Constitution and pundit claims, where he realized how many fear-based lies he had been told. Having stood in both camps, I ask him what we should know about why the Conservative message resonates with people, and how he thinks we can find common ground one empathetic conversation at a time.

Key Takeaways:

✔️Kindness and civil conversation will go further than name-calling or mudslinging ever will, regardless of which side of the conversational divide you are on.

✔️The magic of empathy is that if we can really deeply listen and understand that we can deeply listen without agreeing with each other, initially, we can at least have a conversation.

✔️People will not always change what they believe even when faced with facts. They have to be willing to change, do their own research, and see things from a different perspective.

TUNE 🎧 IN HERE: https://bit.ly/3f6tn4h

And remember, wherever you are…VOTE! Make your voice heard.

Check out more great guests and conversations about all aspects of empathy on The Empathy Edge podcast. Right here or find it on your favorite podcast player.

More you might like:

Mónica Guzmán: How to Have Fearlessly Curious Conversations in Divide Political Times

Jonni and Maria Go There! Podcast: What the Hell is the Patriarchy?

How to Make Your Voice Heard

Who Influences You – and Who Do You Trust?

Thought leadership is nothing new. Strong personalities make up the fabric of business success folklore. Henry Ford. Richard Branson. Steve Jobs. Oprah. Sara Blakely. Mark Cuban. Jessica Alba.  Tony Hsieh.

Since becoming an entrepreneur in 2008, I have been exposed to so many more of these cult personalities that many folks who still work in corporate life have never heard of. Marie Forleo. Chris Brogan. Gary Vaynerchuk. And further,  there are those thought leaders that influence us in the personal development and lifestyle space: Mel Robbins.  Lisa Bilyeu. Glennon Doyle. Tony. Robbins.

Influencer marketing may be a fairly new concept, but thought leadership (which I equate as somewhat similar) has been around a long time. It’s a fabulous and authentic marketing tactic. Establish  yourself not just as a successful leader in your organization, but as a leader in your industry. Someone who has their finger on the pulse of trends and customer insights.

There are many influencers and thought leaders that inspire me. From whom I learn a lot. But I am very skeptical of those who get elevated to gurus, saviors, and absolute truth-tellers. 

It got me thinking about how we decide which influencers we will trust. Which we will follow. I don’t even like the word “follow”as it implies discipleship. 

And that is my fundamental problem with many of the “gurus” out there. When I started out in entrepreneurship, I immediately spotted such snake oil salespeople a mile away. They promoted how they knew the “secret” to your business success. If you learn their formula or do things exactly the way they will tell you (for the low, low price of $5,000), you will be able to buy a jet! They planned extravagant conferences, walking onstage to pounding rock music and fire torches going off. 

I saw new entrepreneurs, mostly women I have to admit, spending THOUSANDS of dollars they didn’t have to take a short cut promised by the so-called prophet.  It made me so angry, I even tried to pitch a Wall Street Journal reporter to do a story on it.  

We definitely need influence in our lives. But we have to be more discerning about who those people are, and what we expect from them. So how do you decide who to trust?

I believe it’s wise to avoid experts who raise these red flags:

  • Make you pay exorbitant amounts of money to learn their “secrets.”If they can offer a framework, or valuable lessons within a curriculum, that is one thing. But if they start making me think there is some secret shortcut to success or a
    “7-figure business”, I keep my guard up.
  • If their social media feeds are full of acolytes agreeing with every word that drops from their lips – or if followers expect them to have all the answers to the challenges in their own lives, I back away. We should never give anyone else that much power. 
  • Anyone who encourages people to go into massive debt to fund their dreams. Not responsible. And not sustainable. Just gross. I’ve heard one such current trendy expert tells her “students” that if they don’t go into debt and max out their credit cards, they don’t want it badly enough. Big no for me.

How do I know who to trust? Well, that’s harder for me to put my finger on. I value authenticity, but not manufactured authenticity. It’s kind of like pornography: You know it when you see it. With our eyes wide open, we can tell when someone is genuinely trying to help people or when they are trying to hustle them. I also value those who treat others with kindness, respect, and empathy and don’t believe they are “too good” to talk with them. And I especially value those who you can disagree with and they invite this with curiosity rather than having their authority questioned. 

We should always be questioning and conversing, not blindly following supposed influencers or experts. (TWEET THIS!)

No one has all the right answers, and we shouldn’t act like these people are gods. They are human. We can definitely be inspired by them, learn from them, and be open to new perspectives, but do so with our own self-confidence fully intact. 

Who do you love to follow and learn from? What makes you trust them? Who do you currently avoid? Would love to know so please DM me on Instagram @redslice.

Photo Credit: Zac Durant on Unsplash

Living a Life of Integrity

My dad, Joseph Piccininni, passed away at 93 years young at the beginning of July. He fought a ridiculously brave fight, constantly getting up again after heart issues, bladder cancer, kidney cancer, and more. One thing you never did with my dad was count him out!

For those who knew him, my dad LOVED a party. Quick with a joke, smile, and cocktail, he loved being around friends and family more than anything, never wanting to miss out. When we were planning my wedding, he said, “Make sure we have a fully stocked, open bar for our guests!”

Dad was married to my mom for 62 years before she passed away in 2016. He worked hard his whole life and was one of my earliest influences on having a strong work ethic. He was a butcher and in the auto wrecking business. among other things, before earning his college degree in night school while raising three young sons with my mom (I came along later) to become an engineer, which he was for more than 30 years. Dad even kept working into his 80’s, at the local butcher counter and as an Ohio State stadium usher! He loved designing and building things (structurally sound, but aesthetics could be better!) He built out the attic of our childhood home into a 2nd floor, designed and built a few sheds, decks, and even built our summer house in Mastic Beach, NY.

Dad served our country in the Korean War – and was always happy to share the story of that time he and his Army buddies attended a Hollywood party at Rosemary Clooney’s house in L.A.!

My dad taught me so many lessons about integrity, inclusivity, and happiness – lessons that have helped me succeed my whole life and into my entrepreneurial journey. He welcomed everyone into his home – our friends, neighbors, workmates. His zest for life was palpable. He taught me that age is just a number and you are only as old as you act or feel. “Appreciate your age, Maria. In 10 years time, you’ll wish you were the age you are now, so always enjoy it!”

Dad wrote me a six page letter when I went off to college  – and told me it would be the last such letter he’d ever write to me. In it, he shared how proud he was of me, and gave me all sorts of advice for life: Honor yourself and your integrity. Work hard and honestly at whatever you do. Surround yourself with good people and friends. Never lose sight of who you are and the generations who came before you. And to enjoy every single second of college – and life.

As a kid, it was my dad who helped me (unwillingly) learn to not care what other people think. He always loved embarrassing us kids in public!  Usually, it  involved singing loudly in a parking lot or doing something goofy in front of our friends! He loved turning almost anything into a song – grocery shopping, trash collecting. Dad also had a strange fascination with cheesy 80’s music, in addition to his love of the Rat Pack and Big Band era. He often sang “I Just Called to Say I Love You” when he’d phone me up.

Luckily, my son and I got back from our London vacation in time to say goodbye to my dad before he passed away. He was unresponsive but he knew we were there. Every now and then he’d open his eyes and nod. We played his favorite Rat Pack music for him. We kissed him goodbye. We left that first night and I just knew in my heart he had seen all of us and could now leave in peace. He passed away the following morning.

My dad taught me how to love life, how to welcome people into my home, how to work hard, how to live adventurously yet also with integrity. And in his own way, he taught me valuable lessons about what choices not to make, and I’m equally grateful for those.  I love that I got to speak to him a few days before he died, by video, when we were both able to say Ï love you” to each other.

Who influences you? From whom have you learned valuable lessons?  It could be a parent or another role model. It’s a great idea to take stock on the lessons that person has taught you and how it influences your everyday life and action. In the end, who made you who you are?

Representation Matters

This month, Ketanji Brown Jackson was confirmed to the US Supreme Court – the first Black woman to be on the bench. A woman with way more qualifications and experience than any of the sitting judges. And yet she had to prove herself over and over, and was subjected to ridiculous questions, biased scrutiny and outright disrespect.

Some people may not understand why this is being celebrated, so let me tell you: REPRESENTATION MATTERS

We hear that phrase a lot, but what does “Representation Matters”mean?

It means having a seat at the decision-making table so those views and experience can be represented in important decisions. Studies show that diversity leads to better decisions.

It means others from that same group can see themselves in those same achievements and see what is possible for their own lives.  Representation provides validation and support for similar groups – especially children – that they, too, can accomplish those goals.”IÏf you can see it, you can be it.” 

It means educating majority groups to see such people in positive, non-stereotypical ways. For example, female scientists, gay doctors, hispanic academics, asian athletes.

It means seeing yourself and your story reflected in media, advertising, literature, and art to reflect on your  own lived experiences and normalize those experiences for others.

If we want to create a more empathetic workplace and world – and make better decisions for everyone – we have to start by having more diverse voices at the table (Tweet This!)

That is why representation matters.

Related posts and info for you:

We discuss the impact of seeing role models “like you”on the “What the Hell is the Patriarchy?!” episode of my other podcast Jonni & Maria Go There so please check it out.

Why Brands Need to Speak Up


The Empathy Edge podcast interview with Khalilah Lyons: DEI Done Right for Leaders – and Our Kids

Choose Your Words Carefully

Words matter.

Choose Your Words Carefully

How we name or articulate something defines how we see it. We often get lazy and use words in the wrong way (ever heard someone say “mute” instead of “moot” point?). But that can have a profound impact on how effectively we connect with each other.

If someone says they “love” you, it should mean something, Yet, I throw around the word “love” all the time whether I’m talking about my son, TV shows or tacos.

Studies show that language linked to gender bias differently impacts men versus women in performance reviews. Labeling men as “assertive” puts them in a  positive light, but women who are described as “assertive”are seen more negatively. Same word. Different meanings depending on gender.

Words have power. They can inspire, provoke, oppress, terrorize, mislead, persuade, or comfort. (TWEET THIS!)

We have to get better at intentionally choosing our words and not taking for granted that we know what we’re both talking about .

Speaking of love, the feminist writer and cultiural icon bell hooks wrote in All About Love: New Visions (Love Song to the Nation Book 1):  “imagine how much easier it would be for us to learn how to love if we began with a shared definition. The word ‘love’ is most often defined as a noun, yet all the most astute theorists of love acknowledge that we would all love better if we use it as a verb.”

Words matter.

One person I follow on LinkedIn and who will shortly be on The Empathy Edge podcast is Suzanne Werhtheim, Ph.D. She talks about inclusive language and posts great content about different words and phrases related to inclusion and how you can say something better to be more inclusive of others.

When it comes to your message, don’t take words for granted. Have empathy for your audience so they can receive your message with open arms and take action.   Words are nuanced. Words evoke emotion, depending on the lived experience of your target audience. Choose wisely.

Stuck for words? This is my not-so-secret secret brand story weapon.

Some related posts for you:

Does Your Story Connect With Your Customers?

Go Beyond the Focus Group for Better Customer Insights

Say No…But Try it This Way

3 Tips to Differentiate Your Messaging

3 Lessons for Entrepreneurs – from an Accidental Entrepreneur

3 Lessons for Entrepreneurs

I never thought I’d own my own business. But here I am, just celebrating 14 years of Red Slice.

Whoa. It’s the longest job I’ve ever had!

My corporate career was very successful and I was on a good trajectory. I liked getting regular paychecks, benefits, clear goals and metrics (most of the time!). I thrived on working in teams. 

For those who want to know the nuts and bolts of how Red Slice came to be, check out this 3-part Behind the Scenes series from a while ago. In it, I shared a lot of very specific lessons at each phase. 

In general, here are 3 lessons for entrepreneurs – hard-won advice from this self-proclaimed accidental entrepreneur!

  1. Define Your Goal, Purpose, and Definition of Success. You cannot skip this step. YOu might roll your eyes at this advice, but let me tell you. I did not quite hammer this out – as I said, my entrepreneurial journey was not quite super mapped out. I did have a vague idea of what I wanted Red Slice to be –  and ended up changing that vision 2 years later. You can always adapt and pivot. But start off with some kind of map of where you’re going and MORE IMPORTANTLY, why are you doing it? What is your motivator? This will steady you through some storms as you move forward. And never let anyone else define success for you. What does success look like for you? For me, it was creating more freedom in my life. It wasn’t about building a huge global agency. I was very clear on this from the beginning! In that respect, I have achieved immense success!
  1. Don’t Go It Alone: No one is an expert at everything. Starting out, it’s super important to have a good bookkeeper/accountant and lawyer. Set things up the right way to save yourself headaches later. Sure, you have to be scrappy at first. I didn’t hire my first virtual assistant until years into my business. And I paid the price in wasting a lot of time and doing things inefficiently. Know when it’s time to pay someone else for their expertise so you can operate in your own zone of genius. Don’t try to be a hero. When you need help, connections, referrals, advice – ASK! No smart business person will think any less of you. 
  1. Be Open to Change: What’s that they say about change being the only constant?! Don’t get so set in your plan that you miss out on opportunities – or that you make yourself miserable trying to make something work that just isn’t. I adapted my business a few years in and was so glad I did. It was a risk, but it was a smart one and it paid off. If I’d held on too tightly to my original picture of what I thought my work would look like, I’d be super miserable and not half as successful as I have been.  Never say never!

Entrepreneurship is hard, but it is such a journey of self-discovery. You get to know yourself, push your limits, and achieve your goals! (TWEET THIS!)